is it almost 2nd trimester yet???

So I went to the doctor again on Friday and I am "officially" pregnant now. They did another ultra sound, right at 7 weeks and you can see the little gummy bear shaped baby AND I got to see it's little heart beat too! It was pretty darn cool. Unfortunately Nathan had to work, so he didn't get to see it. If he can't come to my next appointment I am going to see if Dr. Tutt will let me record part of the ultra sound on my iPhone so I can show Nathan later.

 

My next appointment isn't until November 28th, but we decided that we are not going to wait until Christmas to tell the family. We are planning and announcing the pregnancy at Thanksgiving and I honestly can't wait. It's so hard keeping it secret! I keep having dreams that I accidentally tell someone and everyone finds out. I had one dream where Marvin just figured out- we were at some family function and Marvin was like "Oh come on people, Tarin is OBVIOUSLY pregnant. She has like every symptom- how does nobody else see this!?" It was a very realistic dream- I woke up all panicked thinking....Marvin knows..... Haha! Anyway, Thanksgiving is only a week away- and I am so happy that the family is going to know so I can stop trying to hide how miserable I am.

I feel so blessed that I have the ability to get pregnant and I know I am going to be thrilled out of my mind when the baby actually gets here, but every day I feel so awful! I cannot wait for the first trimester to be over- SUPPOSEDLY my symptoms should start to feel better between 11 and 14 weeks. I try to keep in mind that this is only temporary but Christmas (close to my 14 week mark) seems reeeeeally far away right now. Every time I got up to walk anywhere in my house yesterday I would dry heave. I can't control it- I just feel sick all day and all night. My doc prescribed me Zofran but it only helps withe the nausea 25% of the time. I guess it's possible that it is doing something though because I haven't thrown up since taking it- well except for a little bit the other day when I attempted to do dishes.

I miss sleeping like a normal person. Between having to pee and having a giant gas bubble constantly lurking around my digestive track- a good nights sleep seems impossible. Heck, even finding a comfortable sleeping position is hard and I don't even have a baby belly yet! And in case you were wondering, at the moment I am slurping down a smoothie with hefty dose of fiber supplement because I'm all backed up! It reminded me of the quote from Juno when she tells her parents she is pregnant- "If it's any consolation, I have heart burn that is radiating in my knee caps and I have taken a dump since Wednesday...morning!"

I'm just really looking forward to feeling human again!

my shopping cart: morning sickness editon

Well since my last post my nausea has been pretty persistent. My eating routines have changed a bit since this "morning" sickness has kicked in, so here is a little look into what I can stomach these days.

 

Pre-made soup. I love anything that just needs to be heated up. Bonus: it tastes delicious.

 

 

I heard that sucking on peppermints can help alleviate morning sickness. I have found it does help me a bit.

 

 

Peppermint flavored water. My theory was that if peppermint and staying hydrated are supposed to help nausea, peppermint water would be a God send,  so I tossed 4 of these suckers into the cart. Turns out that it doesn't do much. It doesn't help, but it doesn't hurt either.

 

 

Oyster crackers. LOVE for a quick stomach neutralizer!

 

 

The nurse from the "Future Mom" hotline said to eat peanut butter crackers before bed to help prevent night time sickness, so these are sitting on my night stand.

 

 

Um... cookies just sounded good at the time....

 

 

These english muffins advertised that they were high in fiber. Heaven knows I neeeeeeed fiber these days and peanut butter sounded delish to go on top.

 

 

Apple sauce sounded nice and neutral and potentially nutritious.

 

 

I haven't eaten pop tarts in ages- but when I came across these, I had to get them. I couldn't even wait until I got home to eat one. I busted them out while I was loading the rest of the groceries into the car.

 

 

Milk and cereal.

 

 

Watermelon was another thing I heard would help nausea.

Unfortunately it didn't work for me, but it didn't make throw up either, so it's not a total waste.

 

 

A bunch of frozen crap that just needs to be heated- because I DO NOT feel like preparing anything.

 

 

 

So there is a peak at what I have been eating. I try to sneak in nutritious stuff where ever I can but I just eat what whatever doesn't turn my stomach at that given moment.  Ugh! Nausea is the worst!

post-halloween zombie transformation

Yesterday, November 1st at 6:15 p.m. I had my first pregnancy puke. It was awful! I had been feeling nauseated all day long and had started randomly crying like 3 times throughout the day. And the thing that is frustrating about the crying is that I knew in my head that it was stupid for me to be crying but I couldn't stop! The tears and the sobs just kept coming. This is ultimately what lead to my first throw up experience. The sobs shook my insides just enough to make me puke up the apple sauce and couple pieces of Halloween candy that I had eaten only about an hour before. It was the worst! It got in my hair- and that only made me cry more!

I was nauseated all night and still am this morning. I know I probably have more "morning sickness" in my future and I am not looking forward to that at all. I have said it a million times- I would rather be stuck on the toilet all night with diarrhea than to be throwing up. I haaaaaaaate it! I feel so miserable- and feel extremely guilty about feeling so miserable. I have finally had the blessing of pregnancy bestowed upon me and the past couple days the misery has been over-shadowing the joy. I am incredibly grateful to be able to bear a child of my own, but I didn't realize how much it takes out of you. Obviously I was aware of symptoms, but actually experiencing those symptoms is whole other experience. I literally felt like the walking dead yesterday. My stomach was so unsettled, all I wanted to do all day was lie down so my stomach didn't get jostled. I am soooooo tired- like always. Even after I wake up- still tired! My boobs are still pretty sore. I feel like I have to wear some sort of bra 24/7 because as soon as I take a bra off it feels like I did something to make gravity really angry and they feel super sore and heavy. I can smell EVERYTHING- which can be good but now that the pukies have shown up, probably not so good.

I wanted to make dinner last night but the only thing that sounded good to me graham crackers and ginger ale- which Nathan so lovingly went and got for me. I feel like a bad wife because I can't even think about making my husband food without feeling like I am going to barf everywhere. I have like no energy or motivation to do chores. I just want to curl up in a ball under my blankey...which by the way is only comfortable for about an hour and then I wake up dying because I feel so hot!

The more of these not-so-fun symptoms I experience, the longer 9 months seems.....

Yesterday was the first day that I kinda wished we had told some people- I really needed a shoulder a cry on- preferably a shoulder attached to a person who has experienced this all before. Oh well- people will find out soon enough. We are thinking of telling the families at Thanksgiving now, as long as all our ultra sounds are looking good and healthy.

Well I am going to go sip my ginger ale and lay down....and let's be honest- probably cry.

I'll write again when I have something to share, other than whining.